What NOT To Get Your Girlfriend For Valentine's Day

1. Exercise Equipment:  No girl wants to be reminded of her weight, especially on Valentine's Day.  There's no better way to kill the mood then to remind her of the fact that she probably should be running instead of eating that fancy dessert.
2. Stuffed Animals:  Yes they are cute at the time, but what do you do with them February 15th?  These are better left at the store.
3. Cheap Bath Products:  Girls get enough of these on Christmas to last until next year.  Go to Victoria's Secret, Lush, or even Bath and Body Works if you want to get her any kind of lotions, body sprays, or body washes since that's your safest bet.  Leave the ones from The Dollar Store, Marshall's, and TJ Maxx behind.
4. Gift Cards:  Gift cards say, 'I wasn't sure what to get you, because I didn't want to think too hard about it because I'm lazy so I'll be taking the easy way out'.  No girl wants to be an afterthought.  
5. An Animal:  Never buy an animal without talking long and hard about it to everyone involved.  Animals are a huge responsibility.  It's not fair to the person you're buying it for or the animal itself.
6. Gag Gifts:  No girl wants a whoopee cushion or fake vomit or plastic dog poop ever.  EVER.
7. Trashy Lingerie:  Let's be honest, this gift is for the giver, not the receiver.  And everyone knows this.
8. Book of Homemade Coupons:  This was cute when you were six and had no money but you still wanted to get your mom a Mother's Day gift, but now this is just cheap and dumb.
9. Domestic Gadgets:  Nothing is as unsexy and unwanted as a kitchen or household object on Valentine's Day.  Leave these gifts for wedding registries.  
10. Only Candy:  Unless the candy is something fabulous, like from Dylan's Candy Bar, then just getting a gift of chocolates is a bit of a downer since it's extremely boring.  I mean who wants to tell their friends, 'He got me Hershey's Chocolate for Valentine's Day.  And that's all".  Nobody.